by Laura Bell

The Morrigan is a complex topic, with many of us unable to agree on what or who she is or isn't. She is a mystery. Her many myths make up a complex tapestry. Even the people who wrote these myths cannot seemingly agree on who makes up The Morrigan. It changes depending on which story you read. I believe to truly understand Her (or try to) we have to experience Her for ourselves.

To me, the Morrigan started out as a singular Goddess. The first Goddess, in fact, that I had ever read about. I was only eleven years old and had somehow found myself on a Pagan path. The first 'witchy' book I bought had a small paragraph about Morrigan in it. I enjoyed wearing black and Gothic jewellery at the time and Morrigan seemed to resonate with me. I knew nothing more about her for many years other than her colour was black, she was the Goddess of war, her animals were the crow and raven and you could ask her for protection. But that was OK, I was very young. I might not have known lots of written information, but my soul knew her. I felt protected and mothered by Her in high school, when I was bullied. I would smile each time a crow or raven flew by, knowing Morrigan was near.

It wasn't till much later that I read about the trinity of Goddesses who make up The Morrigan. At first I couldn't get my head around this. I knew Her better now. A natural progression. A change had occurred in me and I saw Her healing side as well as Her motherly side. It was at a time of huge transformation and healing for me. She urged me to rest. She would let me know that things would get better, that there was a reason to keep fighting.

The last few years have seen another change. I bought books about The Morrigan and read about her many guises. I was shocked to see how many Goddesses I could see aspects of Her in. I see Her in my dreams, a flame-haired, Celtic warrior who inspires my art and pushes me forward to do what is best for my current situation, to put my fears aside and follow my heart and dreams. The Morrigan has nudged me forwards into situations where I would normally be shy or terrified. Sometimes this results in amazing opportunities and sometimes it hasn't worked to my advantage, but it's the experience that helps me grow and learn, ready for the next challenge.

As you can see, our relationship has evolved many times. When I first started working with Morrigan, She felt like one Goddess and now she feels like hundreds - all combined to make an energy, an army of warriors, that I call The Morrigan. She may be something completely different to you, every experience with Her is unique. The Morrigan has fascinated me for more than half my life, I feel a deep love for her and I look forward to seeing how my work with her continues to progress through the different stages of my life.